An Ordinary Man: #11 The Importance of Shame

 Pain, shame, and regret, though difficult, are essential tools in our spiritual growth, serving as catalysts for transformation. By embracing these experiences, as Peter did after his denial of Christ, we open ourselves to God's grace, allowing Him to reshape our hearts and guide us toward true righteousness. (Sermon Given 1/15/2012)

Transcript

I wanted to, ask the question. You know what? What is what is the result of the absence of pain? both physical and spiritual. of course, one of the, side effects of leprosy as a disease is that it leaves a person with no pain. There is no pain in their appendages. And so a lot of the damage that happens, to a leper happens because they keep, doing things that, injure their hands or their feet, and, they end up with, stubs.                                       

Really? at their appendages because they can't feel pain to avoid, stepping on things or, chopping into things or different things that happen to injure their feet or their hands. And so, you know, the absence of pain leaves them without, functionality. spiritual pain has a similar consequence, the absence of spiritual pain. Think about what spiritual or psychological pain is, and think about somebody who has a complete absence of spiritual pain.                              

Who would you who would you think of? Yeah. Psychopath. honestly, I didn't tell her this ahead of time, but, here's a person who, is completely free to do all kinds of, vile things without any conscience. Why? Because he's pain free. He's he's free from shame. He's free from remorse. He's free from the pain of regret.                        
And, the consequence is, evil. How important is our spiritual pain in our lives? How important is shame? feeling shame. Feeling remorse? Feeling regret. Regret. How would it affect us if we didn't have any sense of spiritual, regret? Would the absence of spiritual pain be a good thing or a very, very bad thing? one thing you could think about in terms of a physical condition.                                           

what is it? what kind of physical condition do we need to be in? If there's a complete absence of physical pain, will we be dead right? And the same thing is true in our spiritual condition. If a of a human soul is, free from any sense of conscience or guilt or remorse, you could say that that person is dead, spiritually speaking.                                    

And that that's exactly, I think, a good description of, psychopathic man who has no conscience in the harm that he does to others. today, as we continue in our series entitled An Ordinary Man The Life and Teachings of the Apostle Peter, we're going to look at a moment, a very important moment, and Peter's life, a moment that surely he would have liked to have avoided, but like to have avoided, like to have what he would have liked not to have had, but a moment that I think we could argue is one of the most important one, one of the most formative, one of the most necessary moments in, Peter becoming who Christ could use for his glory. we're going to look at a moment of great shame and regret and ask the question, how important was Peter's shame in developing Peter into the man that had such an impact in our lives? Many ideas that he he wrote and came down to us. We might even not even subscribe to him.                                         

But we are affected by him and affected by his life and his teaching. And, one of the most important moments that created, Peter into an influential life was a moment of great shame, and important change was needed in Peter. If Peter was going to become the kind of man God wanted him to be, and that change would have never come about without sorrow, regret, or shame.                                          

And so I want us to ask ourselves the question, how important is shame in our lives? If we hope to change for the better? do we ever experience, the motivation to change for the better if we, have no shame or no regret? think about that for a second. How important is the idea of regret in terms of a motivator for us to increase in virtue and, develop in, goodness, we all try to avoid the pain of shame for regret.                                      

But what would become of us without it? When we repress or deny our feelings of shame or regret, are we better off for it? One of the interesting things we're going to see in today's passage is that there were some who, tried to break the mirror that Christ was reflecting back on to them. And Peter, looked into the mirror.            
You know, we all, when we face Christ, see ourselves. And do we want to break the mirror of what is reflecting back to us, or do we want to, recognize, who we are and, come to yield ourselves to the blessings of God's love, to change us from what we are and to what we ought to be.                                         

Is shame and regret necessary for our well-being? Can I live a good life, and can I become a more virtuous person, absent the pain of regret? This morning's message is entitled The Importance of Shame. And we're going to be looking at John chapter 18, verses 15 through 27. Heavenly father, Lord, as we look at your word this morning, father, it is just, visceral, visceral response.                                      
We have to try to hide our shame, to try to remove ourselves from guilt, to try to deny our regret. but, Lord, you have, along with life, along with our spiritual life, you have given us, shame as a corrective, as an important, revelatory tool for us to see ourselves as we are, Lord.                               

And if we live in some deluded state, unwilling to look at our shame or unwilling to see what our regrets are. Father, we will institutionalize our error, and we will remain in our own darkness. And Lord, we just pray today as we see, the moment of Peter's great shame. we we will. We pray today that we will be benefited by it and, recognize the importance of, accurate self-evaluation.                                     

Bless the reading your word this morning. In Christ's name we pray. Amen. Okay, John, chapter 18, verses 15 through 27 begins in verse 15. And it says, Simon Peter and another disciple were following Jesus. Now this is occurring right after Jesus's arrest in the garden or in the olive grove. And they were following Jesus as he was being taken to the high priest house, the high priest, was Caiaphas, and he lived in the same residence with his, father in law, the former high priest. And together, Peter was brought to their residence. I mean, Jesus was brought to their residence, and Peter and this other disciple, presumably John, were following Jesus there because this disciple that is probably John was known to the high priest.                                      

He went in with Jesus into the high priest courtyard. But Peter had to wait outside. but Peter had to wait outside. wait outside. At the door, the other disciple, who is known to the high priest, came back, spoke to the girl on duty there. And Peter, I think there must be a word hidden in there.                                                                   

And and brought Peter in. yeah. And then the girl says this, you're not one of his disciples, are you? The girl at the door? Asked Peter. He replied, I am not. It was cold, and the servants and the officials stood around the fire they had made to keep warm. Peter also was standing with them, warming himself.                                

Meanwhile, the high priest questioned Jesus about his disciples and his teachings. I have spoken openly to the world, Jesus replied. I always taught in the synagogues or at the temple where all the Jews come together. I said nothing in secret. Why question me? Ask those who heard me, surely they know what I said. When Jesus said this, one of the officials nearby struck him in the face.                      
Is this the way you answer the high priest? He demanded, if I said something wrong, Jesus replied, testify as to what is wrong. But if I spoke the truth, why did you strike me then, Ananias? Then Annas, set him still bound to Caiaphas, the high priest. As Simon Peter stood warming himself, he asked. He was asked, are you not,                                      

You're not one of his disciples, are you? And he denied it, saying, I am not. One of the high priest servant, a relative of the man whose ear Peter had cut off, challenged him. Didn't I see you with him in the olive grove? Again Peter denied it, and at that moment the rooster crowed. Now, to understand this passage, we need to know, the context which isn't, laid out fully in the Gospel of John.                 

We need to need to know the context of the commitment that Peter had made just a few hours earlier to Christ, and the prediction Christ made concerning what Peter would do in Matt and Mark, chapter 14 verses. 27 through 31, we see, what preceded this event, just hours before the denials that Peter made, we see, Christ saying this.                                      

He's talking to his disciples and he says, you will all fall away. Jesus told them, for it is written, I will strike the sheep, and the sheep will be scattered.                                

But after I have risen, I will go ahead of you into Galilee. Peter declared, even if all fall away, I will not. I tell you the truth. Jesus answered, today, yes, tonight, before the rooster crows thrice, you yourself will disown me three times. Oh, yeah, that's not what Peter thinks. But Peter insisted emphatically, even if I have to die with you, I will never disown you.                                  

And all the others said the same.                                          

So here we see Christ predicting that they're all going to fall away. They're all going to, deny him. And, Peter says, look, Lord, all these other guys might be cowards, but I am not going to act cowardly even if I die, I will remain faithful to you. I will not disown you. And Jesus says, yes, you will.                                        

In fact, this very night you will. In fact, you'll know, that this has come to pass. When the rooster crows. And then a few short hours later, Jesus's prediction came true. And when the rooster crows, he remember Jesus's words, that were, that were. And then in accordance with Mark's account, it says he broke down and wept bitterly.                             

And in Luke and Matthew it says he went outside and wept bitterly. Now the the message, the theme of the message this morning is this, important change often begins in regret. Important change often begins in regret. Let's take a look at, John 26 through 27 again.                                        

One of the high priest servants, a relative of the man whose ear Peter had cut off, challenged him. Didn't I see you with him in the olive grove? Again Peter denied it, and at that moment the rooster began to crow. Just a few hours earlier, Peter was willing to wage war, a single handed war against those who came out to arrest Jesus.                                         

In fact, he cut off the ear of Malchus. Now, one of Malchus, his relatives was there watching what had happened. And back in the courtyard of the high priest, this relative goes, I recognize you. You just cut off the ear of my relative back in the olive grove. And Peter says, no, no, that's not that's not me.                               

that was his third denial. And, think about this for a second. You know, Peter's courage in the olive grove was bolstered by the fact that when the soldiers came out to arrest Christ, the soldiers were knocked back on their rear by Christ, saying the words just a few short words just by the power of Christ's words.                          

you know, who is it you're coming to to find and saying I am? He, knocked these soldiers back. And so, you know, the Peter says, I'm on the side of the power here. I'm going to just step out and, just take over because I can see who's in charge. And he had this false sense of courage and cut off the the ear of Malchus.                

And then Jesus told him to put his sword away. But now his Lord is, in submission to those who came to arrest him. they weren't, falling all over themselves. They were acting as though they had authority over Christ, although we know they didn't. And, Peter's courage had melted into a cowardice ness, and all of his bravado was being shown for what it was.                              

And at that moment the rooster crowed. And suddenly Peter saw himself clearly as he was, and he realized that Peter, that Jesus saw him as he was as well. And he felt a shame, because he had made such grand promises of unfailing loyalty. Only a few hours earlier. Now to be confronted with his cowardice ness. he was a man looking in a mirror and he could see in the eyes of Christ his what was distorted.    

And he was ashamed. He was ashamed of what he saw. He was ashamed of the reality. He was ashamed of the incongruity between what he said he was and what he really was. his regret, regret caused him to cry bitterly. we don't really picture Peter as a weeping man, do we? It says he went out and he cried bitterly.                  

He was sorrowful. He he was he was just weeping at his shame. And, at the reality of what he saw in himself. What would have happened if Peter would have never come to this kind of shame? What would have happened if he never gained a clear understanding of his own personal weaknesses and failures? What if he continued in his self deluded idea of himself, that he was strong and fearless, and could be brought down by knowing that that he was going to face death courageously?        

Yet, when it came down to it, he didn't stand up to even a servant girl. Hours earlier, he was ready to take on a contingent of soldiers, and now he was, meek and cowardice, even to the questions of a servant girl. This moment of regret, I want to say, was one of the very most important moments in Peter's life.                  

It enabled him to see himself accurately, and it prepared him for the change that Jesus wanted to make in his life. You see, our shame humbles us, and our humility prepares us to receive Christ without shame. We remain in a diluted sense of arrogance, and in that diluted sense of arrogance of the door to our Lord remain shut.                                       

When Jesus came, he came. What he came preaching the kingdom of God. He's a repent, for the kingdom of God is at hand. And all along Peter and the others imagined that what he was teaching was that he was going to come and establish an earthly kingdom where the environs would be restored, and that that oppression would be lifted, and all the human suffering that came from the outside would be, would be gone, and they would be co regents with him, working with him together in this glorious kingdom.                                     

And of course, that isn't totally inaccurate. That is part of the external part of the Kingdom of God that will be established one day when Christ returns. But that's not what the work of Christ who came and became incarnate, came to do. First, he came to establish the kingdom of God in the hearts of men, because in order to create a kingdom where all things are right, first you have to have citizens that are right.                                 

You can't create a righteous, community with wrong people. We ourselves corporately create the community that we live in. And if you're going to have a kingdom of God external, you have to first have a kingdom of God internal. And throughout Christ's ministry, Peter did not get this neater than the others. They had to come to see that Christ came to establish his kingdom in their hearts, to change them from the inside out, to redo, do his regenerative work first in the soul and the spirit of man before he does it within the culture of man, he establishes here that, that, that a good society, must be populated with righteous people.         

but those righteous people have to have the kingdom of God established in their hearts to begin with. God. Jesus sees us as we are, and he sees our need to be made right from the inside out. For Jesus to change us, he needs to begin with us seeing ourselves as we are to to through shame, have an accurate view of ourselves and our need for his help.                                

Regret is one of God's most valuable blessings. That's a weird thing to say. The pain of regret is one of God's most valuable blessings because without it, the door to eternity does not open to us. The road into glory begins in contrition. It always has, and it always will. And without shame the door is shut. Without regret, the door remains closed.                                           

We remain stillborn even in our own self delusions if we don't come to shame. And one of the things I'm going to explain today is that everyone that faced Jesus that day had an opportunity to see their shame. Blessed be to to the Lord God Almighty. Peter did. And we'll see that some there is groups that didn't. The question is, is when we look into the mirror of Christ, do we break the mirror so we don't see what we're looking at?                                        

Or do we? Are we willing to look at what the mirror reflects?                                   

Again, the theme of this morning's message is important. Change often begins in regret. And point number one is this shame is a key to our salvation. Shame is a key to our salvation. What I want to do is to take a look at the same story, but look at it in the Gospel of Luke, where he had some details that aren't in John.                  

So let's take a look at Luke chapter 22, verses 60 through 62. Luke chapter 22, verses 60 through 62. This is the same story with a little more detail. a little different detail, Peter replied. And here he's replying for the third time. Man, I don't know what you're talking about. Just as he was speaking, the rooster crowed.          

Then the Lord turned and looked straight at Peter. The Lord Jesus turned and looked straight at Peter. In the moment of his shame, he looked straight into his eyes.                                          

Then Peter remembered the words the Lord had spoken to him. He remembered that Christ had predicted his denials, and he remembered his braggadocio claims.                                    

Before the rooster crows today, you will disown May 3rd times. And he went outside and wept bitterly.                                        

Jesus looked straight into Peter's eyes in the moment of his shame, in the moment of his shame. The penetrating eyes of the Lord Jesus Christ looked into his soul. There was no place for Peter to hide. The truth was overwhelming. Surely we think, he will reject us if he sees us as we are. But he sees Peter just as he is, and what Peter saw in his eyes were.                                   

Were were was a look of both sorrow and acceptance. He saw both the look of sorrow in Christ, but also the penetrating love of God, the love that Christ had for him. Christ knew Peter all along. Peter only had come to know himself at that moment. All along Peter had been loved by Christ. Jesus knew that moment of rejection.                                  

He knew that he was going to disown him. He knew that that's what was in him. but as he stood there looking at Peter, Peter saw in his eyes, and it broke Peter. He saw the love of God looking at him, even in his shame.                            

Now, I want you to think about this for a second.                                          

Peter felt shame that day, but he wasn't the only one that should have felt shame. Think about what what Jesus had done during his trial. These self-righteous men who prided themselves in being those who upheld the law illegally arrested him in the middle of the night and brought him before trial. Now, I'm sure many of our good judicial ideas come from the Jews, and one of them is that no one has to incriminate themselves.                                      

And the first thing they try to do is they try to get Jesus to incriminate himself. They said they came and started examining him about his disciples and about his teaching. And Jesus turned it on them, and they should have been ashamed. He revealed their shame. He said to them, look, if I have done something wrong, you tell me.                                

I'm not going to tell you if I've done something wrong. I spoke openly daily in the temple and in synagogues. If you have something against me, bring a charge against me. It should have been a shameful moment to the leaders who thought that they upheld the law. But what did they do? Instead of saying, oh, he's right. We're violating our own principles and, bringing trying to get him to incriminate himself instead of that.                                 

What happened? They slapped him. It's a perfect metaphor of the way, sometimes people respond to Christ. Christ is like a mirror. He was reflecting to them their wrongness. And instead of being ashamed, they slapped him. When we we all look into the mirror of Christ and we will respond one way or the other. We will respond like Peter and weep at the need for our own forgiveness.                                    

Our will respond like the religious leaders, and we'll break the mirror. Don't reflect back on me. My wrong. I'm going to slap you. I'm going to reject you. I'm going to crucify you rather than and look at what your life is revealing about me. In Christ's eyes, Peter saw what the Pharisees could have seen as well. What all what the high priest could have seen as well, what anyone could see.                                    

He saw the love of God, even despite his failure, he saw the intense love of that Jesus had for him, even in knowing him as he was. Think about this.                           

Think about all the times that Peter, over the last three years or the prior three years, had looked into the eyes of Christ. Was there ever a moment that had more impact in his life? Was there ever a time he looked into the eyes of Christ and had had had it changed him more than at this moment when he looked into the eyes of Christ in the midst of his revealed shame.                                          

When we look into the eyes of Christ, thinking that we're the greatest and we're we're on top of our game, it doesn't affect us nearly as much as when we look into the eyes of Christ. In the midst of our failure. When we see that God loves us and is and has made an atoning sacrifice for us, even when he has known all along everything about us, it has a greater impact on us than when we live under the delusion of our own goodness.                                          

This was a moment of great change in Peter's life. A case could be made that Christ, looking into, his eyes at the very moment of his shame was, the most profound teaching that Peter has ever received without a word. I don't know if I'd make that claim, but I think you could argue that this teaching that he was learning at this moment without a word was perhaps the most profound, revelation that he had even in being with Christ all those years.                              

Peter's shame was a prerequisite to his salvation. It was in his failure that he understood Christ's love more fully. As long as we hide our shame from ourselves and from Christ, we block the light of his transforming and penetrating gaze, that gaze that gazes into our soul and doesn't reject us no matter what it sees. It is in that love that we find our solution, not in our own righteousness.                               

He came to establish his kingdom in us. He came to establish his kingdom in us. He came preaching, repent, for the kingdom of God is near. And he came to establish his kingdom in us. by first of all, revealing our shame to us on the cross and at the same time revealing his love for us. There's a painting that hangs in the foyer here in church.                                        

It's a copy of this painting here called The Son of Christ that hangs in the Louvre. And, when we first put that, copy up on in the foyer there, the most dominant thing in our church, I had a church growth consultant tell me that was not a good thing to put there because it was a downer.                                     

It was a depressing thing to see Christ dead and crucified coming off the cross. It wasn't an appealing, picture. and that is true. It isn't. It reveals the shame of all humanity, but it also reveals humanity's only hope. It both reveals our shame, but it also reveals our hope. Our only hope. Our only hope is to be naked before God and recognize that he still loves us and made provision for us.                                      

We will never, we will never achieve the righteousness that we hope to achieve on our own merit or our own virtue. Peter Sorrow was temporary, and the sorrow of the cross is temporary, and it leads into a joy eternal.                                      

But it is the doorway. Important change often begins in regret. Point number one is shame is a key to our salvation. And point number two is, tears of sorrow give way to tears of joy.                              

Looking again at verse 62 of, Luke, it says, and he went outside and wept bitterly. That would be not good if that was the end of the story. But those bitter tears that Peter, was weeping, those tears of deep sorrow were only for a moment. They were only temporary. His sorrow, of repentance, is what brought him into great joy.                                      

Do we ever change for the better without our change? Beginning in regret. You've probably seen what I've seen many times in different forms. A bumper sticker or a t shirt or, Or, some kind of slogan that says this laugh now, cry later, and that expresses the exact, exact opposite of what this text to saying, the idea of the idea or the philosophy of laugh now and cry later.                                          

It's just live without regret. Do whatever you want, you know. Just throw yourself to the wind, do whatever feels good, and, laugh now and whatever the whatever consequences of you reap, whatever harm you cause, you know, you can cry later, but laugh now. This is the exact opposite of that meaning here. It is. Cry now and laugh later.                                      

It is deal with, the the truth now and be brought into joy forever. we can laugh now and have a temporary, a time of of frivolity and cry forever. Or we can cry now. And having eternal joy forever. That's why regret over our own sin and failure is so important. Because if we face it now, we won't have to face it in eternity.                   

Without regret, without regret over our sin and our failure, we will never repent. We'll never change our mind. We'll never turn away from our darkness. and enter into God's light again. The theme of our message this morning is important. Change often begins in regret. And point one, number one is shame is a key to our salvation. And point number two is that tears of sorrow give way to tears of joy.      

I'd like to conclude this morning, with, Second Corinthians leading into our communion time. verse seven, chapter seven, verse ten, and it talks about the kind of sorrow that leads to joy. and we're going to see here in the example of Peter and every other Christian, this is true. It's also true. And the apostle Paul who's writing these words, it says this godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves what no regret.                                   

If we want to live a life of no regret, it starts with regret. But worldly sorrow brings death.                                  

Here's the kind of godly sorrow that we see in the Apostle Paul's life. here he was on the road to Damascus. He was going out to persecute Christians, even kill them. When he got there, he was thinking he was doing God's will until he was struck down by a light. And Jesus asked him, who are you persecuting?                    

Why are you persecuting me? And Paul said, who are you? And he said, I'm Jesus. And Paul was blinded by his sorrow and became on the foundation of his sorrow, the leading advocate of our Christian faith. His faith began in sorrow. Our faith begins in sorrow. But what a glorious road it puts us on. What a delightful, prospect we have in eternity.                             

We're on the path to glory. We. We trust in the one who, sees us as we are, and yet has, committed himself to preparing a place for us, for our eternal, well, being with him in heaven. He is preparing that place even now.                                    

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